You now get sick at the thought of what you love now.



I wish I was a hat.

You are a big sombrero I grab to get sick in.


I wish I had a photo of little Chicho.

You do, but he is dead in it.


I wish I was a hamster.

You are and I buy you to replace little Chich only I forget to throw out his little corpse first. (poor chich)

I wish we weren't discussing my hamster being dead.

We are instead discussing your approaching demise.

I wish I wasn't so morbid apparently.

You are instead afraid of all things that might one day pass on. This leaves you trapped in a plastic bubble with a fake rubber plant for a friend.

I wish I had more fingers.

You get more but lose them making my rubber plant.


I REALLY WISH I COULD FIND MY HAT!!!

You find it and it grew so large it crushes you to death.

I wish I could stop typing and go to bed.

You do. You sleep. Then Grugg steals your hamster.


I wish I could too.

you marry a can of ROOT beer.


I wish I had more time.

You do, but you're inadvertantly forced to spend it with us.


I wish I could find a good car again (and a hat!)

You found one and TOOK it. Now you're wanted throughout Canada for grand theft.


I wish I was a better Taoist.

You are...but then angry buddhists (contradiction?) crush you to death.


I wish I had a pet frog named Spanky!

You have a pet frog named Spanky but he steals your Orange hat and you can't find it!!



I wish I was having a New Year's Eve party

You are having one and all goes well until Chicho and his gang of wild dwarf hamsters crashes it.


I wish dwarf hamsters liked one another enough to live together as adults.