They say it's like riding a bicycle--you never forget... Unfortunately, your natural 1 seems to imply that this is not always the case.

Bad enough though this is, showing off to your friends just how badly one can be tied around one of those things, you suffer from a previously unknown side effect (no one has ever forgotten before) of loosing your memory for how to do all those myriad of other things that people claim are just like riding a bicycle.


Now, I cross my fingers and roll a Balance check.

You manage to walk on the sidewalk! Congrats oh wait never mind sorry about that. Here let me help you up. (it was a six not a nine )


I roll a handle animal check while loving on my

Your kitty loves you very much and even learns three bonus tricks: Attack Postal Worker (DC 15) Curtain Climb (DC 10 Same as Spell) and Alarm (DC 20, 25% chance for False Alarm)

As a side effect, you contract Cat Scratch Fever (showin love for the Nuge!)



I roll an Herbalism Check (2.0 nonweapon proficiency)

Ooops, critical miss, you contract a nasty case of Poison Ivy.

I roll a perception check to find the bar?

Congradulations! The solid steel bar was positioned about head-level directly in front of you. Too bad you didn't roll the success before you 'found' it. I'd put some ice on that if I were you.

I shall attempt to roll up a Bluff check.

The tribe of troglodytes accepts you as one of their own, complete with arranged marriage to the chief's beloved (and slightly deformed, try not to stare) adult child!

I roll an Open Lock check.

Success, sadly it only worked on the nearby canal and you're now waste deep in water.

I roll skill check on lanuage to be able to speak with the Bar Maid.

Success! You found the last living serving wench who knows COBOL! Of course, she IS in the Venerable age category, so I can't promise anything for your other plans.

I make a Tumble Check

Success and Boy George is there to "Tumble For You".

Spell check on turning water to mead.

Failure! The water transmogrifies into O'Doul's Light Non-Alcoholic Abomination In a Bottle! You need to be extra careful when using spells from third-party Open Game License sourcebooks.

I make an Astrology (2.0) check.

Success, but you find out the sign you were born under says "Eat At Joe's".

I need a Fortitude check to try and drink the O'Doul's anyway.

It was basically just water anyway. "Light Non-Alcoholic"? Oh, the horror! Anything less and it would have been bottled humidity.

I roll for a Disguise Check.

Success, even with those horns you blended in to the herd.
Have a nice train ride to the Chicago stock yards.


I roll a stealth check as I sneak up on Eol with a bucket to water. Payback time!

("If I do it, I get a whuppin'. I do it." --Bugs Bunny)

Success!

But now, you must roll 32 consecutive Athletics checks to outrun an enraged Eol who chose to forsake his Will Save to avoid the rage, by the way. The DC begins at 10, but each successive check carries a cumulative +1 to the DC. Must reach 20 successes before 2 failures.

(see, I'm trying to adapt to 4ed!)

I roll a Sense Motive Check (but I'm not sure why, the DM just said I needed to do it.)

Failure!
You remain blissfully unaware, as the DM smiles and says, "This should be quite entertaining.

I role a Will Check to refrain as Ion sets up another round. (How many of those tiny glasses is he going use?)