^ Actually needs oars

< Prefers to swim

v is a Hydrophobe

^ one supraorbital torus short of being a Neanderthal

> chuckling to herself

v confused

^ knows confusion only because it is the only constant ...

< Has a Suessian complex

V Still wonders how to get in contact with their UAA (unidentified alien abductor).

^ Thinks U2 is a spy organization ...

< is paranoid of being spied upon

v spied someone doing something and hasn't told anyone.

^ Needs a shave

< Just shaved

V Never shaves

^ probably nicks himself so often he has more band-aids than skin showing.

< skin is egg-zackly the color of band-aids, so they don't show
(and wonders if she should show S-D how wrong he is about her personal shaving habits)

v was last seen in a bikini with as much "coverage" as a couple of band-aids and some string
(eewwww! just got this mental pic of Grugg inna bikini)

^ only thinks I would wear said "bikini" but in truth would not be caught dead, or alive in it for that matter

< is male and does not wear bikinis.

v thinks a bikini only comes as floss for the gluteus maximus not realizing that this is only one type and that there are several styles (also known as cuts) available with the floss only being one particular genre

^ actually DOES think this, and wears his with pride.

< swears allegiance to his self-imposed greatness.

v swears they didn't do anything, but knows they did.

^ secretly wishes he was Green like Kermit...not Orange like Grugg's hat

> almost finished Christmas shopping

V still looking for the prefect gift for me

^ Is so "green" she she comes with her own personal carbon-dioxide filter system.

< Thinks Utan the Green lacks that "fearsome ring"

v Thinks "living green" means perpetually celebrating St. Patrick's Day

^ secretly wants to be known and feared as 'the Bright Pink' and not 'the Orange'

< is wondering why he gets hit everytime he pinches some one for not wearing green.

V wants a cookie to love and hold dear to her-his heart. . . . until some one passes the milk.

^ has already ruined one computer trying to get the cookies out of his hard drive ...

< gots milk, but prefers donuts instead of cookies.

v uses his/her CD/DVD drive tray as a retractable cup holder ...

^ Will venture to tim horton's in the near future.
< needs to avoid closing the dvd player while its holding a beverage
v Spends a large amount of their time watching paint dry.

^ is strange for using a DVD player as a cup holder O.o...
< Is totally excited about Christmas for my kids this year!
V is not as cool as he/she thinks he/she is...

^ Knows at least part of the cool truth.
< Has been told he's cooler than he thinks he really is ...
v Probably lives in one of those "ice-box-frigid" states back east


< (shudders at the mere thought of a covering of snow more than an inch deep)