You finally found the magic combination...
It digests the hairballs and spits the DH poster back up along with a note that reads...HAZMAT not accepted here.




I feed it Randy Jackson, Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell

It spits out Ryan Seacrest. Who wouldn't?

I feed it a pineapple and a monkey.

it spits out a pint of Chunky Monkey


I feed it 4 Nintendo Power mags, a spent battery and a toothless comb

It spits out a burnt-out and retired Mario.

I feed it a parrot, a jug of moonshine, and a water balloon.

...a redneck pirate. (Inbred cousin of the Pirate-Ninja)

I feed it the character sheets of four very flawed player characters.

It spits out the blood-smeared giant spiked rock, with some sweet candied nipples still stuck to it.

I feed it a bag of Cheetos and a bottle of Mountain Dew.

Ack ! Ya made me sgork my caramel!

The machine spits up -- me!

And now that I'm back, I'll feed it two gumdrops (mint), a teaspoon of cod liver oil, and a toothpick.

It spits out Pinocchio, smelling of fish.

I feed it Utan's caramel and a can of Easy Cheese.

It coughs up a bag of M&M's new caramel cheese candy.



I feed it all my bills

It spits out collection agents with fangs and claws.

I feed it a trombone and a walrus.

It spits out Tennessee Ernie Ford singing "16 tons"


I feed it Paris Hilton AND Britney Spears ...

It spits out an adult video store.

I feed it Donald Trump...and a duck-billed platypus.

It coughs up an egocentric duck with bad hair




I feed it a shiny Buffalo penny, a cherry poptart and Evander Holyfield's ear lobe

it spits out a Ferengi wearing Fruit-of-the-Looms ...

[edit]
wait. a buffalo penny?
[tears the machine apart to get at the penny]

THEN I feed it one potato, two potato, three potato, four ...

...five potato, six potato, seven potatoes more! And some deranged tater farmer hopped-up on Sevin dust weilding a blood-soaked garden hoe!


I feed the DVM, myself in an attempt to hide from aforementioned psycho-farmer and his rabid potatoes!