Used Kitty Litter.

I feed it thirty sharpies.

it spits out the victim of a frat prank


I feed it the a frat house

It unburdens its insides of an entire greek alphabet, written on little stone tiles. In fact, it spits up the ancient greek syllabary known as Linear B from the time of the Myceneans. Additionally, it spits up a plurality of each letter/symbol. And a board. We can now play Scrabble: It's All Greek to Me Edition.

I feed it a challenge to said game of Scrabble. Verbal format, so it must first eat the vibrations in the air.

It spits out a tuning fork.

I feed it all of my Halloween decorations I haven't gotten around to putting up yet...

It spits out Santa Clause.


I feed it a tin of aluminum.

It spits out a VW Bug.

I feed it Maximum Overdrive

It spits out the peices of an exploded star ship.


I feed it 2 balls of yarn

It spits out a kitten, shaved.

I feed it a mellon baller.

It spits out 4 watermelons 11 cantaloupes and 14 honey dew as well as a giant bowl 37 pints of strawberries and direction for use of a melon baller

I feed it A top of the line laptop...

An angry electric blue Eel looking for its former home in said laptop flies out of the room via an open window program and disappears.

I feed it and Eel skin wallet with demagnetized credit cards.

It spits out a pair of Eol-skin wingtips, a tax return form, and a collection letter from the IRS... all packaged neatly in a tinfoil hat.


I feed it the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown!

At first it does not appear to spit anything back out, in return for the Great Pumpkin, (Charlie Brown!) but it is soon apparant that it is exhaling/internal fan mechanism a strong scent of fresh baked pumpkin pie into the room.

I feed it a Snapple, whether it is a fruity beverage that I am introducing into its 'digestive' track, or an apple infused with tin (laugh, ye who know your periodic table, or read XKCD) is entirely up to the next poster.

The machine eats the apple infused with tin. It doesn't believe in periodic tables and therefore doesn't laugh. In fact, it grimaces over the aftertaste of delusion, and is not pleased for some time. Then it burpes out a full copy of all the 46 volumes in the Encyclopedia Magnum.

I step aside for a second, then put in a Demonic Vending Machine. Let's see how it deals with itself!

Puzzled... It then spits out a mirrored image of ALmerin


I feed it The original Almerin

It spits out Almerin...INSIDE the demonic vending machine. And the coin slot is gone!

I feed the working one a wet dog, a tube of Super Glue, three plastic cows...and a plunger.