In spits out a great Price on used light bulbs.


I fed it a Ugo, and lollypop and a wheel of moldy cheese.

It spits out a diabetic Frenchman on a unicycle.

I feed it 20 ball bearings and a copy of today's Wall Street Journal

It spit out a bunch of Unholy High Rollers.

I fed it a pound of lead, a two cent stamp and a Ring of Free Action.

It spits out a pound of feathers sealed in an Overnight Priority envelope that delivers itself.

I feed it naptime and pleasant dreams

It spit out video of "Insomnia On Elm Street"

I fed roast pig, and horse shoe and a glass of water.

It spits out the nasty bottle of Port wine that made King Twilliam pout and gave Mr. Conquest the gout.

"I say, do I detect an impish hint of. . .Swine in my wine?"


I feed it a toothbrush without bristles, and a book without words.

(sorry everyone--this is hour 21 that I've been up. where is the Sleepy Smiley?)

It spit out a tongue depresser that say Aaaaa for you.

I fed bottle of hand sanitizer, a paper clip and coffee cup.

(BWT Pit, you get an applaude for 500 posts)

It spits out an accountant who is also a hypochondriac.

I feed it a chicken.

It spit it back out because it tasted like Rabbit!

I fed it a firecracker, a bottle rocket, a cherry bomb and a lightening bug.

It spits out a swarm of Infernal Hellwasps (Medium Natural Beast, Lv 6 Soldier AC 19 Fort 17 Ref 18 Will 15 Hp/Bloodied 44/22) with Explosive Sting (Melee: +10 vs AC; 1d8+5 AND 10 Fire) and Countersong Drone (Opposing Bards cannot use Bardic Song within 10 squares of this creature).

I do hope you have some Raid equipped. . .

I feed it a tin of mints and a roll of duct tape.

It spit out a MacGyver parfait. They make themselves.

I fed it a 12 pack of Sam Adams, pretzels and the latest edition of trivel pursuit.

It spits out the funniest episode of Jeopardy ever!! Alex was up on the podium, slurring his words, stumbling about comically. Oh, and did I mention it was Celebrity Jeopardy, with Sean Connery, Keanu Reeves, and Jeri Ryan (she played Seven of Nine on ST:Voyager). Those three were so embarrassed for him. The show's judges gave each of their charities $1,000,000 out of pity.


I feed it a can opener and a cinder block

It spits out the Simpson's episode where Homer's mother dies.

I feet it the Twilight trilogy (because my brother has it and I can not bare the shame of living under the same roof as it).

It just it back to you because it didn't want it either.

I fed it a mushroom, a tornado and a mirror.

It spits out Lloyd Bridges from "Airplane" who can't look at himself because he picked a bad day to quit doing mushrooms. Let's face it, that guy had serious substance abuse issues. And he was in charge of people whose job it was to safely land aircraft?? Must have been after Reagan fired the air traffic controllers.


I feed it a pack of Big League Chew and a Troll Doll