granted you get proper sleep, non-stop for 47 years.

i wish for immortality.

Granted, you are now stone, so you will never die.


I wish for the perfect Bloody Mary.

granted, but since mary is always on her "fun time" you get constantly yelled at.

i wish my statue could move.

granted hurricane force winds pick you up and blow you into the ocean where you are now sinking...

I wish to have next sunday off of work...

in fact you can have the whole weekend off...YOU'RE FIRED!!!!!

I wish I had a genie's lamp so I could make some REAL wishes.

granted but what yu dont know is that some of the wishes u post here were granted by a real genie

i wish i had an army of pit fiends that do my bidding.

Granted, But find the Original first.

I wish that many of you get Monday off to celebrate my birthday.

granted. many have monday off but no one celebrates your birthday (sorry)

i wish i had a six figure salary job

Granted! They are all zero's! Can we say "Welfare"!

I wish for enchanted d20 dice that always roll over 11.

granted but its magic only affect knowledge firearms checks.

i wish someone told me that there were 3 books!

They did tell you, they just forgot to tell you which editions to use.

I wish that I will have all lucky rolls tonight at our Tabletop session.

granted! you roll all 20s every single time, but are immediateely accused of cheating and exiled from the game!

i wish to duplicate myself!

However, after duplicating yourself, your duplicate thinks of the same thing and so on and so on. The other issue with this is that each duplicate comes out with a different attitude apart from your own. This leads to irritating one another, to point of all of you killing each other.



I wish my novel would be finished by the end of the year.

granted you finish it in one night, u turned it into one novel flipbook!

I wish to pinch myself.

granted but you break an artery and die

I wish for no evil in man