In fact Solvy did pose a query; however, she did it telepathically and only those of us with holes drilled in our heads were able to see it.


Why do donuts have holes but donut holes do not?

Because they're really called Timbits. Get with it.



Where in the world is Carmen Sandiago.

Right here

Is Waldo really missing and do we really care where he is?

Of course we care where Waldo is! Don't you know he holds all the secrets of the universe inside that hat on top of his head? Why do you think he's in the witness protection program?


Why do they call chop sticks...chop sticks?

Because pick-up sticks was already taken.


3?

No Grugg, despite the fact that you think you see three of you in the mirror, I promise there is only one.

Alright, who fed Grugg the mushrooms?

It was Grugg. Not our Grugg, it was the Canadian Humalot Grugg who, in search of food, left his ruins and wandered into the Inn. After spending only a short time lurking in the Comings and Goings forum looking for tasty newcomers, the Humalot Grugg discovered that the Inn was also home to an Eol. The Humalot Grugg fed our Grugg the hallucinogens to create a better target for the Eol and allow his own escape.

(As a side-note: apparently the Humalot Grugg is better at avoiding Eols than our Grugg.)



Why did they revoke Pluto's status as a planet?

it was revolving while intoxicated




why are soap operas called soap operas?

Because they took a normal opera, cleaned out all that dirty italian stuff (Like real emotions and drama) and fed the remains to the American populace. Later, they cleaned out congruency and logic and sent it to Mexico. There was so little actual show left though, they had to show them in Mini-series format instead of the normal hour long segments.

Why does my pepper-grinder always grind either too fine or too coarse, inversily perportionate to what I actually desire?

Because the grinder you brought on sale was the contrarian Pepper grinder (that someone else returned earlier) and NOT your normal Pepper grinder.

Why is the grass always greener on the other side?

There's a bunch of complicated physics explaining the phenomenon, but it basically boils down to the inability of light to decide whether it's a particle or a wave. It goes back and forth between the two, willy-nilly. This behavior is called 'being on the fence' which is why the full saying is: The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.

If light would just make up it's mind, we'd clearly see that the grass on the other side of the fence is, in fact, brown.


What's the difference between a pathological liar and a compulsive liar?

Pathological Liars are from the Pathos Kingdom, while Compulsive Liars are from the Compulsia Kingdom. The two are constantly fighting with each other. The cause of this fighting stems to the fact that the Pathos claim that the Compulsians eat their bread with the butter side down (however due to their tendecy to overstate the truth, this is a lie, and the Compulsians don't even eat bread, but only rolls and then only on Sundays). While the Compulsians claim that the Pathos have stolen their sacred ceremonial butter dish (however it was in fact the Kleptomanians in a neighboring kingdom who are responsible for that, but the Compulsians do not believe the Pathos when they tell them that, due to a long history of lying). So now the two throw bread at each other across their connecting borders and it is unlikly that peace will ever come.

What exactly does one have to do to get a better title than 'Newbie' around here?

((omg! It worked! ))

10,000 miles or 25 posts...whichever comes first
btw...CONGRATS!




if small lies are white lies, what color are big ones?

They are also white. But a bigger and brighter white from Clorox™. Unfortunately, since they have been bleached then they aren't as strong anymore and so are much easier to unravel. Hence how it is easier to see AND to tear apart a lie the larger it gets.


Why musn't you put sticky tape on hairy places?

Duh! Haven't you seen the new Dr. Suess Movie?!

You must never put sticky tape on hairy places because there are colonies of microscopic people living in each hair. Therefore, every time you place the sticky tape on hairy places it will potentially suffocate an entire world of little people, too small for the human eye to see. And though they are microscopic in size, and therefore can't be seen, they do still exist. And in the wise words of Horton the giant elephant in the sky:

"A person's a person, no matter how small."

Why was that kangaroo so snotty and mean anyway?