Sugar spent alot of time in juvenile detention centers growing up, unfortunatly I am unable to disclose further details as his juvenile record has now been permamently sealed by the courts. However, it probably is not the best idea to let your children play with Sugar...

Where is all this water coming from?

(btw, I live in the midwest, we're flooding)

Because when it enters your system it mystically transforms into tiny Vikings, who run rampant throughout your body looking for things to pillage. Artificial sweeteners are worse...ROBOT Vikings!

Where do babies come from?

Dude... those aren't babies, they're giant sea-monkies resultant of the flooding in the midwest having washed right through the Sea-monkey processing plant and inundating the world with them... And Meri, I'm pretty sure that Duncan is the source of all that water... He's just attempting a sneaky little cover-up so that noone knows that he's responsible for the Sea-monkey infestation.

((Tosses Meri a life jacket, some sandbags, a canoe, and 10 lbs of beef jerky... Seriously... Keeping the good vibes out for you folks. ))


Who was that masked man?

That wasn't a man, nor was it masked. It was a woman, and she had a starfish stuck to her face.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

The chicken crossed the road to try and get away from the sea monkeys. And you see it wouldn't have had to do such a thing if you hadn't caused all the flooding... hmmm...

((btw... thanks for all the flood gear Eol, so far on dry land, but with how much water is around here it is good to be prepared! ))

Question:

What ever happened to toys without batteries?

The toys with batteries made fun of and neglected all those without, so they slowly vanished from our eyes... however, just because they are vanishing doesn't mean they aren't still there and are planning a large scale revolt againt the toys with batteries that will ultimitely be the cause of a nuclear war...

wow... I can't believe how far out I went with that.

anyway... why does the d20 dice, the cause of all glory and misfortune to characters of D&D, often choose inappropriate times to give misfortune?

Because Satan lives in the d20. Woooooooo....

Why is gas so expensive?

Because my burritos were so expensive.

Why can regrow hair, put a space station in orbit, and arbitrarilly decide to reclassify a planet (thereby ruining YEARS of childhood science projects) but we can't cure the common freaking cold?

Because the cold virus is actually composed of tiny intelligent aliens who are the brains behind all the other stuff.

Why is chocolate milk brown?

because chocloate milk isn't filtered. It goes straight to the udder.

BTW...not many people know this but there are 4 udders on cows...three for white milk and one for chocolate.



why are firetrucks red?

If someone rang your bell and pulled your hose you'd be red, too!




Do you know the way to San Jose?

No...but if you hum a few bars.... (groan)



whay are all the good enigineers Scottish?

You see it comes down to the simple fact that Scottish engineers get more business, and therefore more practice at their trade. I believe the constant flow of business has something to do with their kilts and the view provided when they bend over, which is supremely better than the view provided by most plumbers from the Bronx...

Who created bubble wrap?

The Bubbloids of Bubblex Prime.

Who shot J.R.?

Grugg's alien space bats



How big is a "buttload" ?