You're done shopping, but now you have to go exotic bear wrestling, which most likely gets you crushed to death.



I wish I could kick a rock...to the moon.

you kick that rock and hit the man in the moon in the eye so he throws a piece of cheese at you and crushes you to death.


I wish I could get over this "thing"

You get over it, and then you are crushed to death.

I'm getting quite proficient at writing that...


I wish I could meet...a flaming monkey...and not get crushed to death.

You meet a flaming Monkey who HUGS you to death...at my request.


I wish "crushing to death" was not an option

Ok you are stoned in the town square for abolishing being crushed to death as an option.






I wish I had more stones to throw AND that Grugg would let go of my boobs (check 2 pages back).

you get more stones, only they are so heavy you can't lift them up so instead you drop them on grugg and they crush the poor guy to death



i wish MLSD would go to dictionary.com and search up what "nuked" means
cause according to his terribly spelled post on the previous page,
he stares at himself in the mirror "pertaining to a nuclear or thermonuclear weapon or to a nuclear plant" (aka nuked; definition from dictionary.com) all day
that is unless he means the slang form of "nuked" which means to cook in a microwave

He does not do so, and instead crushes you to death.

I wish I had some sort of secret sensor that allowed me to determine when someone has directed my actions in a way that is perhaps odd. *Searches for Ryst with a hatchet*

You have such a sensor. However, the wish which granted you that senseor is such an action, so the sensor is constantly detecting itself being directed in an odd manner. Since you didn't specify that you also want to know *which* actions are being directed oddly, or how, your life is exactly the way it is now, except with an additional nagging feeling of discomfort from your secret sense.

I wish I had a another warm fuzzy blanket exactly like the one I'm covered in right now.

unfortunately before these miracles happen, your wishing star falls on you during your cruise to Antarctica and you get crushed to death



...
I wish i was on a cruise to antarctica right now

You hit and iceberg, ice falls, you get crushed to death.

I wish for a pickle.

it's a HUGE huggable pickle, and it crushes you to death



i wish i would meet a great dane (as in the dog)

You are a black dust particle floating around until sucked into a black hole which leads you to some odd form of fluidic space where now you must swim or die...so you die.


I wish for a new house.

there's an unpleasant surprise in your new house, and it crushes you to death



i wish i would meet a sumo (that doesn't crush me to death)

You meet a sumo who doesn't crush you to death but he has a terrible digestive problem causing him to have very strong and unpleasant gas all the time. One day, trapped in a poorly ventilated room, he gasses you to death with unbearably smelly farts.





I wish I had more to do on Christmas.

I made you sweater out of your post LSD but it didn't like you and crushed you to death


I wish me and my hubby could go on a nice trip for our anniversary in February.