Actually, we do all carry hoses. We just don't know how to use them.

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Who put the Grugg in the Grugg-da-lug-lug?

those darn alien space bats (Grugg: I did darnit!)




Why is the wind called Mariah?

Early in the 1900's, Americans tried calling the Wind Breathless. Wind got so angry at the name that the number of dust-devils, twisters, waterspouts, tornadoes, hurricanes, and monsoons increased dramatically. Some of the rusults are the Kansas Dust Bowl, Typhoon Mary, and Himmicane Brian ...

Sha-grinned, America renamed her Mariah and even went so far as to write a song by that name in order to appease Wind. Wind kinda liked the name Mariah and settled into a more normal pattern of destruction. Wind is extremely happy to have been named Mariah before Mariah Carey was.


Are Mariah Carey and Drew Carey secretly twins, secetly married, or clones gone bad?

Same person. Never in same place same time. Think about it.



Where in the world is Carmen Sandiago?

Carmen Sandiago does not exist in the world, but instead exists in a special pocket realm just outside the existance of our own dimensional perception of time or space.



Where does the snow really come from?

Angel dandruff. Live with it.


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Who by fire?

Your sister. Who, by the way, borrowed my favorite earrings and never returned them. So i took her car. And then it crashed. In the river. After catching fire. Tell her I'm sorry, won't you?



Where did your sister leave my earrings, anyway?

In a place where you would not care to hunt without Wearing latex or rubber gloves ...

I could care less WHERE Waldo is: WHO is he?

I hate to have to be the one to tell you this, but Waldo is the vindictive little bugger who got tired of always being the one to have to seek in the game of Hide-n-Seek with his many siblings, and so in retribution decided to force the whole world to seek him for the rest of all time!

Why Morning then Night? Why not Night and then Morning? The Evening and the Morning were the first day after all.

indeed... This is truly a complex question... of which the answer is 4 times the square root of an apple on sunday which is blue

RotS was almost right, in that it has to do with Sunday. And since that person didn't pose a query, I feel obliged to answer in the definitive:

Morning prior to Evening is because Sunday is listed as the first day on calendars. If Sunday were the last day (as the sabbath or seventh day reference), then it would be Evening then Morning. Now, if Sunday were the second day, Reality as we know it would be turned inside out and we would have Eternal Mid-Light ...

Whoinell dictated that a (door)bell sound was "ding-dong"?

That would have been the renowned inventor of the doorbell, Professor Ding Dong from China. Not many know he actually invented the doorbell, but he is renowned because how often his name is heard around the world.



Why do spiders hunt the flies and not the other way around? After all, the flies are the ones who can fly and not the spiders.

Bad project management on the side of the flies. Gets you everytime.

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Is it nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outragious fortune?

better in the mind than on the hips I always say.




why don't people think for themselves?

We don't. Too many bonker decisions made that way. Even with help, it's an iffy situation. As an example, look no further than the current president (soon may he wave bye-bye). What really happens is our thoughts are projected to others (at random) and we receive others' thoughts (at random), believing them to be our own.



If 1 is the loneliest number and 2 can be as bad as 1, then why is 1 called the loneliest?