Your wish is granted.

Reality and time pay a visit to Ms. Ritchie and convince her she is waaaay too old to be acting out her adolescent fanatasies. The duo turn her into your next door neighbor who is always coming over unannounced to borrow sugar and talk about the old days when she was a pop star.


I wish I didn't have to work to survive.

your good friend Lyskhala informs you that it's actually spelled Halitosis and it's a condition where one has bad breath. She also informs you that it's contagious and that you have just acquired it.


I wish I hadn't died from Halitosis

POOF!

You didn't. You died of a vicious fruit-fly attack that devoured your eyeballs first, then tunneled inside and eviscerated you from the inside out. Grugg sent them because he thought you sent him a flea-collar.

I wish I had put someone else's name on the card.

(YAY! MY 300th POST!)

The name you put on the card was Grugg which also pissed him off. Now you too have been devoured by Grugg's evil zealous fruit flies.



I wish I lived in balance with nature all the time

The name you put on the card was Grugg which also pissed him off. Now you too have been devoured by Grugg's evil zealous fruit flies.



I wish I lived in balance with nature all the time

The name you put on the card was Grugg which also pissed him off. Now you too have been devoured by Grugg's evil zealous fruit flies.



I wish I lived in balance with nature all the time

looks like you've already been doomed/corrupted on that wish. You've posted the same post 3 times, a very unbalanced number! (though, i tend to think of 3 as a nice balance, since there is one on each side, and one in the middle...but whatever)

I wish i were more motivated and lucky.

wha?????

ANYHOO...

LUCK is attracted to you like Bishops to little boys, it's all over you like white on rice, like a cheap sweater, like a moth to a flame, like.... you get the picture.

It becomes stifling. You can't breathe. It consumes every waking minute. You become distant and slowly fade away in to the dark recesses of what's left of your mind. You cower there for the rest of your life as luck slowly, deliberately devours you until there's nothing left but a meager pile of gold dust.



I wish I had more time to play at the Inn

you get lots more time, but the Inn crashes.

I wish laying in the tanning bed was good for you in all ways.

However, the sudden increase in power consumption worldwide leads to the global ban and ensuing destruction of all tanning beds.


I wish WotC wasn't about to release 4th ed.

It's releasing it's 50th edition which means you're so far behind you'll never catch up.



I wish this wasn't the last season of Battlestar Gallactica

The remake of Battlestar never happened. You're now lamenting the end of the original series.

I wish I could get money for nothing, and chicks for free.

You get baby chickens for free, and when you get the money, it all gets stolen from you by Russian spies.

I wish i could snap my fingers and the laundry would wash and dry itself.

it worked!!! unfortunately it also works for everyone so now without warning, whenever anyone anywhere in the world snaps their fingers clothes wash and dry themsleves...even the ones on your back. brrr...is it cold in here?



I wish I could still take as much LWOP as I wanted.

As there are 3 listings for what LWOP stands for:

LWOP Lease-With-Option-to-Purchase
LWOP Leave Without Pay
LWOP Life Without Parole

...you sadly get the last one...meaning you're only choice would be which lifetime! You can choose 50 years, 70 years, or 100 years. Of course you choose 50...but that means you're in jail for 50 years anyway.



I wish Lysk wasn't in jail. I'd miss her creativity posts.