Easy one.

Your interweb simply never works.

I Wish the snow would stop and that all the ice and snow in Hampshire would melt and instantly evaporate.

The snow all evaporates but the rapid evaporation mixed with the co2 emmitions creates Acid rain that burns through you house and all your belongings, causes you untold amounts of pain but stops before it kills you (Im not THAT mean )

I wish my interweb Worked

CO[2] doesn't form any kind of strong acid, in fact it's very weak acid and rain is naturally acidic from CO[2] anyway. Besides that point I live on chalk grassland anyway so the acid is neutralised. HA

Your interweb works perfectly, in fact you have the best fastest connection in the world, but only between the hours of 12 midnight and 1 am.

I wish for a heat wave.

EDIT: No I don't. I wish for a good SW game in the RDInn with all the things associated with a good game.

The SW game is so unbelievably awesome it attracts the attention of George Lucas, Seth McFarlane and Seth Green, who show up in person--to kidnap you and hold you hostage in their above-ground impregnable dungeon. Ball gags definitely in your future.

I wish for Uwe Boll to never make another movie. Seriously. Corrupt it as you see fit, but that's a wonderful wish!

Uwe Boll no longer makes movies but his fan follows in his footsteps and created lots more films in his style.

I wish for it, Just it

A balloon suddenly springs from your shower drain, filling with blood until it bursts in a horrid shower of gore. Standing in it's place, IT! With several balloons in hand! He smiles, showing his pearly-white fangs and begins to terrorize you til the end of days.

IT - what an awesomely bad book for those who feat clowns! Gotta love S.King.


If I wish for the opposite of what I desire, would it get corrupted into what I really wanted?! :o
- I wish!!

You get what you least desire, But what you didnt realise was, what you thought you least desired was what you acctually most desired, Thus you lease desire became your most desire but the wish caused it to be your leased desire... Ect Ect

Long story short, You caused a paradox that lead to the end of eveything

I wish clowns didnt exist... i hate them so much

I just can't bring myself to corrupt that wish.

GRANTED


I wish there were 26 hours in a day.

Granted. However they are very sticky hours as they are made up of marshmellow creme.

I wish that the DVD shelves in the living room would build themselves.

The Dvd shelves make themselves, but wrong. What aspot of bother

I wish for my house to saty at a constant perfect heat and that it costs nothing in bills of any sort.

Your house catches fire and no matter what the fire department does they can't put it out.

I wish I could live in a castle in the sky

You get your castle but some idiot forgot to give you wings so your castle floats off into space without you.
I wish my dog bear was house trained

He is trained at building houses, he can even decorate them rather well after building them. However he refuses to use carpets and puts down newspaper instead because he feels that it is better than using the toilet.

I wish winter didn't dry out my skin so badly.

Winter doesn't dry out your skin in fact it persperates it. So much so that you constantly look like your sweating even though you're freezing, and the extra water that surrounds you doesn't help.

I wish my kitties could turn into flying tigers.

They are suddenly flying tigers. Flying tiny tigers. They are only about one inch long and buzz around you like annoying small little flies constantly. Mewing and begging for food. It is kind of cute trying to watch them eat a piece of hard cat food.

I wish I could be a flying tiger...